Cruisin' With The Oldies, Cont'd

Right now I'm sitting in an internet cafe in Zambia, waiting for a video of today's bungee jump to upload. It's taken an hour so far and shows only 8% complete, so fair warning: I have lots of time to wax lyrical and fill your screen with bombast.

So while I am here waiting, perhaps for my edification more than yours, I thought I would write a bit more about the trip through Botswana, as I really haven't gone into that yet. Our trip started with an all-day drive from the capital of Namibia, Windhoek, to a town near the Okavango Delta. Eastern Namibia is a part of the world that's so dry that to get the key to a bathroom, you must first have a conversation with the restaurant owner to get a key. When suffering from a case of the trots, this can be both a serious test of patience and quite embarrassing. It goes something like this, and takes place in front of the entire group:

Me: May I have the key to the bathroom, please?
Owner: Is it sit down or stand up?
Me: Um, sit down, I suppose.
Owner: Are you sure? Because all men are meant to pee in the garden.
Me: Yes, I'm pretty sure. And the longer this conversation goes on, the more sure I get.
Owner: Okay, well if you must pee you must go in the garden. If it's sit-down, don't flush until everyone else has gone.
Me: Lovely.

On arriving in the Delta, the first thing I was struck by was how utterly flat this region is. An entire river, the Okavango, empties into the sands of the Kalahari, forming the largest inland delta in the world. It took me a while to get my head around that: a river just flowing into a flat sandy area as its terminus. The result is a swampland that is home to hippos, elephant, crocodiles, and tons of birds and fish. And papyrus. Tons of papyrus; everywhere. It's really beautiful, and the best way to see the area and look for wildlife is in a dugout canoe known as a mokoro (there's a picture of one in the blog entry below).

The most interesting part about the mokoro trip, other than seeing hippos lazing and playfully fighting in a pool right next to us, was learning each of our guides' names. They all come from the nearby village, and must have some dreadfully difficult names to pronounce, for they have adopted pseudonyms such as Rambo, Bimbo, India, Action, and--my personal favorite--Banana Man. On that trip we learned a lot about the local flora and fauna, such as how to use a particular tree to treat gonorrhea. Our guide was kind enough to point out that he had tried it himself and could vouch for its efficacy. It's my sincere hope that I will never be able to speak to its efficacy. Were I able to, I'm relatively certain I wouldn't blog about it anyway.

We hung out at a lodge in the Delta for two days, which provided plenty of time to just relax. After the partying in Cape Town and the gluttony of Namibia, I decided to go for a run. The problem is that with wild elephants everywhere, you can't leave the security of the camp fence. So, I ran on the nearby runway, back and forth quite a few times. It turns out the locals use the runway to walk to their village, a fact I wish I had known before taking off my shirt and setting off for the run. They gathered on the side of the runway to watch go back and forth, pointing, surely thinking I was utterly insane. By then I was committed to my jog, and I wasn't sure if it would be more embarrassing to stop and gather my shirt, meekly walking back to the camp, or to continue on, pretending like I was a skinny Kenyan training for a marathon. I continued to run, but I think the jiggling of what were once my pectoral muscles belied any hope of being confused for a marathoner.

In any case, the Delta was a wonderful experience and one of the highlights so far. I also learned a little bit more about the taxonomy of "now" here in Africa. If you ask someone when something will happen, here's how you know when to expect it:

Just Now Now Now: between now and the next five minutes
Now Now: between now and the next 15 minutes
Now: between now and tomorrow
Tomorrow: never

Damn, 20 minutes later and only at 12%. I hate to say it, but I don't think I'm going to get this bungee video uploaded. I promise I'll do it from home, as the footage is pretty cool. Off to get some grub now...